I got some money cos I just got paid....AND noone wants to party with me...

My friend reckons she is too tired from the night before, I bet if I had just turned up on her doorstep bout 10 she would have been keen to go out. My other friend has kids and I am going to see her tomorrow, and so she cdan't go out, the others hardly ever go out. man I need some partying friends. I only ever want to go out like once every few months, cos I get busy doing other stuff, and there is noone to go with.

I know someone who will be out tonight, but I think he will just want a root, and i aint going to do that so best to keep away from that.

So I got fish and chips (Real healthy aye, there goes my weeks work in the swimming pool!) and some dvd's but I already watched one of them.

On the bright side I did go out last night and had a dance or two. If I hadn't deleted Paulines phone number I could ring her and get her to go out with me. But she drives me Barmy, shes in love with my friend and goes on and on and on about him alllllllll the time.

I keep thinking bout shane cos Mini golf was good, and I can feel me putting my defense mechanisms up around me that are meant to protect me from hurt, which actaully I believe don't work, and only cause anguish and hurt while they are up. pretty much just trying to talk it all down and like it wouldn't matter if he doesn't like me, but truth be known it would matter.

So if I watch my other DVD, I so want to dance, I think I need to go back to my dancing lessons so I can get it out of my system.

My mood is in between, thats why its on none, because I am happy, but a bit fustrated at not going out and a bit sad jsut cos I am coming off "that time of the month" (I knew you all wanted to know those intimate details!) msn wont work for me, which is ok theres only retards on my list there (Oh except for Sparkly Gal and Kall and nite Fenix of course! and a couple of others who are never there...just the others like next_place (thank god for block) and fuuny NZD men with feet and sandal fettishes(warning don't mention shoes around him! you can almost hear him wankin gover the net!)

So if i get real bored tonight, i might put some Meatloaf on and some spilt endz and nasty girl and enjoy running round the house to that... Damn i should have got some pineapple juice while I was out, malibu, ice & Pineapple juice yum. Get drunk at home alone and dance with myself... now that is SAD! hehe

Thank you all for listening to my ramblings... good night