A bloke took his monkey along with him to the pub, the bloke got him a beer and his monkey ate some peanuts from the bowl on the bar, the bloke also decided to have a game of pool, so as the bloke was playing pool, the monkey jumped on the table, snatched the white ball and swallowed it, the bar tender yells, "Ow m8 your damn monkey just ate my cue ball, you will have to pay for that", "sorry replied the bloke", paid for the cue ball and took his monkey home.
About 2 weeks later the bloke comes back to the pub with his monkey, orders himself a beer and racks the table for another game of pool, all the while his monkey was up the bar, saw a bowl of cherries, grabbed a cherrie, sticks it up it's butt, pulls it out and eats it, Grossed out by the act, the bar tender yells out to the bloke "Crikey M8" now that was just gross, your damn monkey grabbed a cherrie stuck it up it's butt, pulled it out and ate it".
The bloke replied "Ohh yeah since swallowing that cue ball a couple of weeks ago, anything round now he measures it before eating it"...
